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Blagues et humour Voici des blagues et un peu d'humour.

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Vieux 2004-05-13, 01h34   #1
Fireall
Demi-dieu
 
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Date d'inscription: mars 2003
Messages: 6 529
Re: To all you coffee drinkers

* You can take a picture of yourself from ten feet away without using the timer.

Pffff ! Est bonne !

j-f

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Vieux 2004-05-13, 06h35   #2
Mijan
Prince royal
 
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Date d'inscription: janvier 2003
Localisation: La cité franche de Sunrise
Messages: 1 242
To all you coffee drinkers

You know you drink too much coffee when...

* Juan Valdez named his donkey after you.
* You ski uphill.
* You get a speeding ticket even when you're parked.
* You speed walk in your sleep.
* You have a bumper sticker that says: "Coffee drinkers are good in the sack."
* You answer the door before people knock.
* You haven't blinked since the last lunar eclipse.
* You just completed another sweater and you don't know how to knit.
* You grind your coffee beans in your mouth.
* You sleep with your eyes open.
* You have to watch videos in fast-forward.
* The only time you're standing still is during an earthquake.
* You can take a picture of yourself from ten feet away without using the timer.
* You lick your coffeepot clean.
* You spend every vacation visiting "Maxwell House."
* You're the employee of the month at the local coffeehouse and you don't even work there.
* You've worn out your third pair of tennis shoes this week.
* Your eyes stay open when you sneeze.
* You chew on other people's fingernails.
* The nurse needs a scientific calculator to take your pulse.
* You're so jittery that people use your hands to blend their margaritas.
* You can type sixty words per minute with your feet.
* You can jump-start your car without cables.
* Cocaine is a downer.
* All your kids are named "Joe."
* You don't need a hammer to pound in nails.
* Your only source of nutrition comes from "Sweet & Low."
* You don't sweat, you percolate.
* You buy milk by the barrel.
* You've worn out the handle on your favorite mug.
* You go to AA meetings just for the free coffee.
* You walk twenty miles on your treadmill before you realize it's not plugged in.
* You forget to unwrap candy bars before eating them.
* You've built a miniature city out of little plastic stirrers.
* People get dizzy just watching you.
* When you find a penny, you say, "Find a penny, pick it up. Ninety nine more, I'll have a cup."
* You've worn the finish off your coffee table.
* The Taster's Choice couple wants to adopt you.
* Starbucks owns the mortgage on your house.
* Your taste buds are so numb you could drink your lava lamp.
* You're so wired, you pick up FM radio.
* People can test their batteries in your ears.
* Your life's goal IS to "amount to a hill of beans."
* Instant coffee takes too long.
* You channel surf faster without a remote.
* When someone says. "How are you?", you say, "Good to the last drop."
* You want to be cremated just so you can spend the rest of eternity in a coffee can.
* You want to come back as a coffee mug in your next life.
* Your birthday is a national holiday in Brazil.
* You'd be willing to spend time in a Turkish prison.
* You go to sleep just so you can wake up and smell the coffee.
* You're offended when people use the word "brew" to mean beer.
* You name your cats "Cream" and "Sugar."
* You get drunk just so you can sober up.
* You speak perfect Arabic without ever taking a lesson.
* Your Thermos is on wheels.
* Your lips are permanently stuck in the sipping position.
* You have a picture of your coffee mug on your coffee mug.
* You can outlast the Energizer bunny.
* You short out motion detectors.
* You have a conniption over spilled milk.
* You don't even wait for the water to boil anymore.
* Your nervous twitch registers on the Richter scale.
* You think being called a "drip" is a compliment.
* You don't tan, you roast.
* You don't get mad, you get steamed.
* Your three favorite things in life are...coffee before and coffee after.
* Your lover uses soft lights, romantic music, and a glass of iced coffee to get you in the mood.
* You can't even remember your second cup.
* You help your dog chase its tail.
* You soak your dentures in coffee overnight.
* Your coffee mug is insured by Lloyds of London.
* You introduce your spouse as your "Coffeemate."
* You think CPR stands for "Coffee Provides Resuscitation."
* Your first-aid kit contains two pints of coffee with an I.V. hookup.


Mijan
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Vieux 2004-05-13, 15h53   #3
Jaerofthelake
Dieu mineur
 
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Date d'inscription: octobre 2002
Localisation: here
Messages: 8 726
Re: To all you coffee drinkers

so je suis correct je n'ai aucun de ces symptomes...



The loremaster


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Vieux 2004-05-13, 18h42   #4
Aristiana
Dieu
 
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Date d'inscription: octobre 2002
Messages: 15 591
Re: To all you coffee drinkers

Est-ce que ca provient d'une expérience personelle Dany?

Clo.

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Vieux 2004-05-14, 07h19   #5
Mijan
Prince royal
 
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Date d'inscription: janvier 2003
Localisation: La cité franche de Sunrise
Messages: 1 242
Re: To all you coffee drinkers

Oui. C'était la journée où j'en avais pris 12.




Mijan
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Vieux 2004-05-19, 01h52   #6
Sszvein
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Date d'inscription: novembre 2003
Messages: 172
Re: To all you coffee drinkers

Motivé!

Sszvein-sama
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Vieux 2004-05-19, 14h39   #7
Mijan
Prince royal
 
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Date d'inscription: janvier 2003
Localisation: La cité franche de Sunrise
Messages: 1 242
Re: To all you coffee drinkers

À prendre du café!? Toujours!


Mijan
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